#1 You put your hair in a ponytail for the first time in 11 years. It. just.feels.weird.
#2 You obsessively fix the ponytail all day long, you seem to have forgotten that your hair is quite heavy and won’t stay unless it’s tied in an extremely convoluted knot on top of your head
#3 You attempt to start the car to go to work (late), but the key won’t turn in the ignition
#4 Yelling at the key has no effect, yet it turns right after you call your boss and right in the middle of a panicked call to your husband for help
#5 Your craziest, most hyper student doesn’t attend school today, but shows up in his pjs with his granddad to pick up his sister. A fellow parent overhears him telling everyone how “He thew up all night long” and rushes down to the classroom to shake my arm mightily and ask: “DOES MATTHEW SIT BY MORGAN!! WHY IS HE HERE AT SCHOOL IF HE WAS THROWING UP ALL NIGHT!!”
#6 The aforementioned parent calmly walks out of the room after you assure her that Matthew was NOT in class today. “Thanks for shaking my arm”
#7 You arrive home and notice small brown flecks of something mysterious around your dog’s crate. You don’t smell poop. You wonder if she….no…she wouldn’t do that….
#8 Your suspicions about the missing poop are verified when your dog sits down under your chair to throw up
#9 You calmly clean it all up and blog about it
# 10 You leave number 10 open, because the day is young…..